(no subject)

[theamazingdalet.livejournal.com]

balthazar tries to get to know cass/help him cope/bridge the gap by chatting with him about Before. after all, he feels pretty well informed; he grew up with two sets of grandparents from Before

but when he actually tries to pick a conversation topic, all his knowledge feels so…fragmented, just bits and pieces. instead, he ends up offering cass some of the portable music players he’s found but hasn’t been able to sell. he tells cass he keeps these ones up front cause they have some of the lullabies his parents sang to him

so cass plugs them in (to himself) for a listen and has a little laugh bc none of them were actually intended to be lullabies; they’re mostly pop ballads

for his own part, cass has no idea why balthazar told him he didn’t have a home; he lives in his van, therefore it’s his home, and it’s cass’ job to make it homelier

like, say, with a pet/small business mascot

balthazar really had not realized how many animals were still lurking around, given that he can’t, say, rummage through nooks and crannies lined with broken glass, or heft huge, heavy pieces of debris out of the way to check on the local feral cat colo–

“WAIT NO THAT’S A SKUNK”

“with the proper care, skunks make playful and affectionate companions,” says cass, cradling it tenderly. “although, in fairness, they generally have their scent glands removed.”

“PLEASE PUT THE SKUNK BACK PLEASE”

look, balthazar explains later, i believe you that cats or skunks or that pig you found the one time would make an adorable pet/mascot, but not living in a van. that’s no life for them, even i know that

it’s no life for a human either, cass points out

or an android, balthazar adds.

but we chose this, yes, i know it’s different. cass moves on very quickly to the next part of the conversation, but balthazar wonders, not for the first time, is it not just as wrong to be dragging cass around the country like this? shouldn’t he have a proper home, too?

(no subject)

[theamazingdalet.livejournal.com]

lolololol i have completely redesigned cass’ outfit for my 999 au, bc his corresponding char’s design in the new sequel has hit on my favourite cass aesthetic of long sweaters and leggings

(no subject)

[theamazingdalet.livejournal.com]

most importantly, they need a cover for cass before they reach balthazar’s next client. he’s been a solitary creature for the past 15 years; exactly no one is going to believe he just took a liking to someone and is carting them around the country for the fun of it

they’ve broken the issue down into two parts: appearance & career

first up, appearance:

cass looks good. really good. way, way too good for this day and age. too hale, too strong, too smooth, too clean, too well-fed, and not at all stressed about his day-to-day survival

like, sure, balthazar looks pretty good, too. being a salesman, he puts as high a premium as he can on his own appearance, but he ain’t got nothing on cass

still, that’s gotta be the lesser of the two issues, right? “we’ll just have to dust you up a bit,” says balthazar

“that’s not going to work,” cass point-blank answers him

“what, why not?”

cass just sort of sighs and starts reciting. “for your health and safety, i have an automated sanitation system that will remove any dirt or bacteria on contact”

balthazar isn’t sure what to say, so cass just scrapes some dirt right off the ground in front of them

“here, watch this,” and then smears it all across his face

there’s a beat

and then a soft hissing sound as it all just…sloughs right off, so perfectly

it’s impressive, just…

“isn’t there an override?” balthazar asks. there’s always an override…right?

but cass just shakes his head. “i mean, there are temporary overrides, for specific occasions. say we were repainting your house, you could set a timed override for paint, and so on. but not dirt. this is just disgusting”

he shrugs. “do you…have any makeup? there’s an override for that”

balthazar groans, rubbing his forehead. “well, i did”

for now, it looks like they’ll have to make do with a fugly hat & scarf combo and hope for the best

(no subject)

[theamazingdalet.livejournal.com]

as for “career,” cass is understandably miffed that balthazar referred to his many household talents as “suspicious”

“here,” balthazar hands him a ration kit as part of his explanation, “try this. how do you know so much about whole foods and their preparation if you’ve been eating these all your life?”

“so, what, no one grows vegetables anymore? that’s suspicious.” cass frowns at him

“all right, so, that’s your story? you grew up on one of the farm plots?” balthazar shrugs amiably. “that’s fine, but just remember, you have to stick to that, then”

“why, don’t farm plots also have doctors?” cass does not understand why he can’t have multiple “careers” when humans clearly have multiple needs, and balthazar doesn’t have any good way to explain it to him. he could compare it, for example, to someone his age claiming multiple PhDs

but he doesn’t know what a PhD is

cass suggests he assess each of balthazar’s clients for their most pressing needs and pick a “career” to match, and while it’s not like balthazar would stop him, he strongly advises against making things so complicated

“what if you forgot who’s who?”

cass just smirks. “my memory’s better than yours, don’t worry”

---

in the end, they hit on the answer while cass is explaining his shoulder compartments as part of balthazar’s “you really ought to know” maintenance classes

basically, he has four “slots” in each shoulder that can hold vials of medication, to be administered via injections by hand…literally

(”er, where exactly in your hand?” “…somewhere,” says cass, staring at his fingers as though he has no idea. balthazar shudders)

but, he explains, the meds take about 12 hours to cure most illnesses

“12 hours??” balthazar splutters

“yes,” cass shrugs apologetically. “as i’m not actually a medical unit, i don’t have access to the really high-grade–”

“no no nono-” balthazar waves his hand frantically. “disappointment was not the emotion i was trying to convey there. 12 hours is incredible! how many doses for each?”

cass looks puzzled. “one…? unless you got sick again?”

they just stare at each other for a long moment in confusion and wonder

“and…how many doses do you usually need nowadays…?” cass is almost afraid to ask

“well, it depends on the medication - provided there is medication - but usually multiple doses over several days…or weeks.”

“days?! weeks?!” cass is horrified. “what happens when it’s epidemic?!”

balthazar shrugs. “some people pray”

it’s a good thing they’re driving, because cass needs to sit down for a while

at any rate, it’s decided; he’s going to be a doctor